Today is Bharat Bandh…. at least Mumbai Bandh. The road outside my house is deserted. All the building kids are out playing football. There isn’t a rick to be seen. Buses are few & far between …. And, I have nothing better to do than catch up on reading.
Amongst the old headlines that I read, in my poor inflated google reader, was one that struck me as being the panacea to all problems. It was, of course, my favorite body – the Khap Panchayat – coming out with another gem. They advocate the lowering of marriage age – from 18 to 15 for girls – to prevent elopement and therefore honour killings!
Om Prakash Mann, Haryana president of All India Jat Mahasabha, said.
“By lowering the legal age of marriage, young couples can be prevented from eloping. A girl brings shame to her family when she runs away. Parents kill the guilty children in a fit of rage,” he said.
My first response was WTF, and my second was ‘what a brilliant idea’ – if we take this kind of thinking to its logical end, think of all the social problems that we can solve. I have jotted down a few, please feel free to add your thoughts to this
- Rape – Men Rape. If men are castrated (chemically, we don’t want to cause the poor dears any pain) they can’t rape. So castrating all men – whether or not they are potential rapists will prevent rape.
- Widow remarriage is against our custom. If we didn’t get married, we won’t get widowed/widowered … abolishing marriage, therefore, will prevent widows. and therefore prevent the socially delicate problem of widow remarriage.
- Female Foeticide - If men are castrated, and marriage is banned, then there can be no children and therefore no female foeticide
- Dowry – if there are no girls there should be no dowry. But, to be on the safe side, let’s ban all goods and services. And, while we are at it – let’s ban money.
- Pollution – Industries cause pollution. Get rid of industries then most pollution will disappear. Also, since industries produce goods, and people ask for goods as dowry – banning industry will also stop dowry …
finally, even if there are only one boy and one girl from the Jat community renaming after all our strictures are followed, we will still oppose intercaste marriage — because it is against our culture
And finally, to all my friends who were embarrassed by the Maulvi’s and their idiot fatwas, don’t worry the Hindus have caught up
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