It is almost a decade since Rangeela was released. And, it was a fabulous film. A.R.Rehman had composed a brilliant soundtrack, there were some rocking numbers, and the actors sizzled. It was possibly my favourite Ram Gopal Verma movie after Shiva. I used to have the tape in my car and listen to it quite frequently. And, then my tape system died, CD’s came in and my PC became my home entertainment system. A lot of stuff I had on tape had not yet been converted to the CD format. And, I lost touch with a lot of music i listened to at that point in time.

Last week when I was out shopping, i saw a CD of Rangeela. Nostalgia overcame me, and i purchased it. A shiny new CD with my favourite songs …. i got into the car, peeled off the wrapping and put the CD to play…. to my astonishment i no longer liked the music. And, there was a part of me that felt terribly let down by it. I think, that in the intervening decade my tastes had changed … and i really didn’t realise it… But, it got me thinking … what else did i enjoy, that i can no longer handle now…. and here are a few of my (earlier) favourite things … that are no longer favourite…

a) American Prayer - by Jim Morrison - there was a time when R was still in Mumbai, when it would almost be an anthem… A whole bunch of semi inebriated people saying waah waah to the American Prayer. About six months ago I was at a friend’s place and there was something that sounded like a terrible audio mix that was coming out of his speakers…… ‘that sounds like cats being tortured’ I said … ‘ i thought you liked Morrison’ was his response…. I do like the Doors even now, but the American Prayer, is just too spaced out for me…

b) Ayn Rand - when i was 13 she was my heroine ….. i was in love with Howard Roark and John Galt. When i was 25 I re-read the books and was terribly impressed by the philosophy … “wouldn’t it be lovely to be an island without bothering about the world’s mediocrity and compromise” . was my take. And, then i read both Atlas Shrugged and the Fountainhead last year. My response to Atlas shrugged and its question “who is john galt” was who cares, and i was seriously appalled by the rape fantasy in Fountain Head — women generally don’t fall in love with men who rape them!!
I found the writing turgid and the philosophy juvenile. Maybe 10 years from now I will appreciate it again.

c) Partying - I used to be out 5 nights a week. A 14 hour working day, 5 hours of hard core partying. I simply got into the groove of socialising, going out, consuming copious amounts of everything that was not good and having fun. I can’t anymore….. I seriously don’t enjoy partying. Hanging out with friends is one thing, hanging out with groups is something quite different.

d) Directing — like most others in my profession i was terribly fida about the film making process. i spent hours preparing, fine tuning technique, understanding light, understanding edit and so on. I was, and still am, fairly good at it…. But, it no longer interests me to the level that it did…. If i am to direct something that is not documentary in nature, i seriously have to psyche myself up …. it is often like watching paint dry

e) Films - i used to devour Hindi Films & Hollywood films with equal gusto . Ever since DD introduced the Sunday film sometime last century, i have been hooked to films. I watched at least three a week (if not more) all the way till 1998 or 1999. And, then one day, i stopped. I could no longer handle the Feature Film. Most of them - Bollywood or Hollywood are excruciating, especially if they also happen to be box office hits :). However, in the last year or so, i have seen stuff that is slowly bringing me back to being an occasional visitor to the theater !

Tags: A.R.Rehman, American Prayer, Ayn Rand, Directing, Doors, Films, Howard Roark, John Galt, Partying, Ram Gopal Verma, Rangeela