Amongst the saddest things in life, is the end of a relationship. It could be any relationship – the sorrow is different, but it is still sorrow.
Why do relationships break up? Maybe they were never meant to be, maybe you outgrow the other party, maybe you got into to it for the wrong reasons.
In most cases relationships don’t start or end in a blaze of glory. In most cases you have drifted into one, and it is most likely they whimper into nothingness.
How do you know it is the end ? It starts when you stop having conversations, because every conversation turns into combat. Soon, there are no safe zones left – all that is left is to reminisce about the past – ‘tujhe yaad hai ‘ type of conversations. It’s almost as if you are using the past to camouflage the emptiness of today. It continues when you start running down the other party – their ideas, their dreams, their aspirations, their friends, and it dies – when neither can let the other grow and in fact stand in the way of growth.
Sometimes, we let memories hold us behind. Sometimes, we think that it can get better – after all, there was a time that there was something to write home about – can it be recaptured, can it be salvaged?
But, then you ask the other question – is it really, really worth salvaging. Is this what you want for the next one, two, five, ten years? Can you really be happy with the level of compromises that you are making to maintain a status quo – and to what end is this status quo – is it to prove to the world that you have managed a long running relationship, is it to prove to friends that you aren’t a failure, is it to family that you handle things on your own ? Is it because you can’t handle pity or sympathy – or is it that you are afraid of going it alone, or is it that you feel that you are too old to start again ?
Somehow, whatever you decide – there is going to be hurt. the question is – should it be a short, sharp cut or a slow whimper into nothingness ?
It is posts like these where I wish there was a ‘Like’ button.
Liked the post, but nothing to say myself in a comment.
will try and find a like button – i was checking the plugin db today – there seems to be a clap button 🙂
Clap will do as well. 🙂
The other option for me is to wait for your post to show up in FB and ‘Like’ it there!
clap enabled 🙂
it kind of looks funny and doesn’t tell you who it is – the search for better plug-in continues. do you know if you can import facebook comments into WP?
This is as much applicable to business relationship as it is to family and friendship
yes. unfortunately. 🙁
You strike a chord here Gargi. i wish I could write more.
Living with a friendship that ended and i somehow have managed to get it back to conversations but they all seem forced. its worth it and so is why i went through hell to get back out of that silence but yes, the difference from ‘past’ still exists and that hurts. Part n parcel of a broken relationship like you said.
🙁 i am sorry for the hurt. but sometimes you have to end the ‘relationship’ to salvage the friendship 🙁
“the roof found its support in other pillars, the scaffoldings forgot that they were no longer needed and it just keeps hurting”
By relationship, I mean friendship. It means a lot to me and so I did every bit to revive and now there is that camouflaging of past, combat because not every sadness or joy is being shared. Its fine by the other person maybe but to me, I feel sad for I see my friend at a distance now.